Colmcille Climbers

Once again the Michael Fishes got it spot on, predicting a showery Saturday and a sunny Sunday. So Helen, John, Sean and I loaded the cars up with the camping paraphernalia and headed to Culdaff, the windscreen wipers going full blast as we left Derry. Dunmore head was dry though (for the time being) and by our 1pm arrival George was on his 4th route with new member Alfie, carefully negotiating the "VS style" moves on Belfast Blitz Boys (VD). Alfie had been regaling him with stories of working in Antarctica and mountain leading in Europe. Pete, PJ, Maeve and Chris were busy on Absent Friends and SRS Slabs respectively.

Mike was practically hopping from foot to foot, so eager was he to jump onto his first route and we picked 10 CC (E1 5b), a nice wee warmer upper *cough*. There was the usual macho undercurrent in all the taunts from George "Sure I've already done that one..." but we set up and Mike made short work of the lead. I was feeling great, a few master classes from Pete Cooper at the Birmingham wall these past weeks, topped up with sessions at the Derry wall and found little difficulty seconding this fine line.

I had 2 ambitions for this weekend: lead Fluid Inclusions (HVS 5a) again but this time not take a damn hour to do so, and lead Bunratti Pillar (HVS 5a) a Brazil Rock line that I completely tired out on and backed off previously. I talked Sean and Helen through the first moves on Absent Friends then scooted over to Fluid, just as the rain started to spit, not what you want ideally on a lichen covered smear-fest. The initial bold swing up onto it was wee buns, my long reach finding a great flake and it was all going great guns until that step right. The spits were now spatters and with no chalk bag I was trying to use the arm of my fleece to dry out the dimple you have to smear on to reach the overhang. Eventually with water running down the helmet into my eyes I gave up and lowered off cursing the timing of the shower.

We gathered at the cars for sambos, the sun suddenly shining again (Bah!) and I glanced over to where George seemed to having a little trouble on the wet exit to How Do Chimney (HVS 5b). A few minutes later he shouted over for someone to second it and retrieve his stuck friend because Alfie had backed off pumped. So off I went and did just that, thoroughly enjoying the moves up the chimney. I picked out a little stone to help get at the friend and tossed it over my shoulder, finding it in my boot after George lowered me off. I couldn't have done that if I'd tried!

The 2 boys Ethan and Shane wanted to try the old climbing so I set Sean up with a top rope on SRS slabs and then dragged Mike back over to Fluid for another go on dry rock. The little monkey boy had got bored waiting and decided to solo Orange Blossom!

I'd left 2 pieces of gear in for the lower off earlier and so was soon back at the smeary step. It didn't look any easier for having been there previously but you just have to trust the boots and go for it, breathing a sigh of relief as you place a big friend in the crack. The move up round onto the final section is a bit pumpy and you have to smear high again to get up. It was easy in hindsight to admire all the moves but on the route they do test you. Well maybe not our Mike...

Helen, John and Sean were ready for another climb but I thought Fluid was a step too ambitious so lengthened the anchors and brought them up Peapob (VS 4b) instead. When I'd brought them all up I looked round to find George who, not to be outdone, had also soloed Orange Blossom and was discussing the merits of doing it this way with Mike. Told you about that macho streak. "Think I'll do Fluid Inclusions next", he says, just to prove that anything I can do etc. And so it was that I found myself on the route for the 3rd time that day, enjoying the well-rehearsed moves, despite yet another encroaching shower.

In McGrory's afterwards we were blessed with the company of the great Gerry Anderson, who awaited his retinue in the foyer before making a grand entrance into the pub. "I fecking ignored him", sez George. "Good on ye", sez we, supping away and discussing plans for the MCI Alpine meet. We left to set up the tents and then gathered afterwards in Alan and Margaret's (who were away AGAIN) for a bite and a sup. For the first Saturday night in ages I was in bed by midnight, only mildly inebriated

The clear night sky meant temperatures of -2 and poor Helen was in the car at 5am looking for extra layers, the old sleeping bag not doing it's advertised job. But clear skies meant a sunny morning and we enjoyed a cosy fry-up before gathering at Brazil Rock. I gathered under Zanzibar with Mike which the guide book states as HVS 5a. The more recent topo states E1 5c but even the higher grade doesn't do the first bold move justice. When Mike is grunting and groaning on a lead you know you're in for a challenge. The route is supposed to finish in the camel's eye but Mike had decided to go right to the top on the lichen face and PJ had to turn away, unable to watch and expecting a fall any second. I swear that boy has been bitten by a radioactive spider in the recent past because he scooted up effortlessly it seemed.

I peeled twice before giving up, unable to find a decent purchase above the first move. I decided that I could either struggle and sweat on this or leave it and save the energy for Bunratti Pillar and so went for the latter. Pete then elected to give it a go and peeled and swore and thrashed and peeled and swore and eventually by hook and bloody crook got above the initial blank slab and on to finish.

I geared up for Bunratti with Mike and stitched the bugger with protection right up to the traverse. Making my way across the aching muscles were making me only too aware that I'd been climbing the day before, the bit of dodgy belly earlier that morning combined with a mild hangover had left me feeling a little drained and I backed off to the safety of the starting ledge twice. After a decent rest I went again, this time reaching the ledge below the big flake. I felt around blindly on the harness for a cam to fit the crack, praying that the first one I grabbed would be the right size. Thank God my hand came up with one of Pete's almighty Omega "this cam fits ANYTHING" friends! Another rest on the rope was necessary because my right arm now just felt totally numb.

Pete and PJ had just done Broadbin's Emporium (S) and Sean had followed them up it, tasked with retrieving Pete's stuck nut. He couldn't get it out though and as I dangled on Bunratti, Sean was lowering Pete down to get it. Suddenly Sean's weight shifted, he lost his footing a little and, in his inexperience, grabbed the wrong end of the rope to hold Pete. One serious rope burn later Pete had fallen 3 or 4 feet and banged his hip, but nobody died and Sean has learned a valuable lesson.

Back on Bunratti I had just about enough strength left to do the big smeary move up, laying back off the flake. I'd previously watched both Pete and Mike peel here previously and it had worried me for the whole route but in truth it was one of the easier moves that day. There were yells all round as I gained the top but I felt near collapse, all four limbs shaking and aching like mad. Thankfully Mike only weighs as much as a bag of sugar because I don't think I could have held anyone heavier. He certainly wasn't about to fall though and it was only a matter of minutes till he and I were making the leap of faith across the top of Brazil Rock.

Still it was mission accomplished. There are much harder climbers out there than me, several of them in our own wee club, but HVS / E1 is the gold standard for me and it was great to tick off those 2 lines. I'm looking forward to a great summer's climbing.